Wednesday, March 28, 2012

First Time

Ok. Never blogged before. I always thought I had tons to say but no one to say it to. The truth is, I have tons to say but, really, no one wants to hear all this. But this is for me, so here I go. I'm a mom first, a talker second, and a teacher third. I can't help but carry all three of those perspectives into whatever I say. I don't really want anyone to know who I am, so I'll just leave it with that general description.

As a mom, to start, here it is. I have the best children on the planet. If I didn't think so, I wouldn't be a mom, right? Having them and being their mom is the best thing that ever happened to me and is clearly what I was meant to do. But being a mom alone isn't enough. They become their own people and, slowly, you have to develop the rest of you. So, I am a mom, first, a teacher, second, and a talker third.

Why am I starting this now? I've been a teacher for ten years and a parent for 9. My  husband is not sure he wants to be a dad and husband anymore. I love him. We are great together. From the beginning, we've been connected. People ask what we see in each other and I don't really know. I just know that when we leave a gathering, I've never wanted to spend more time with any man we've ever met. I've always thought my husband and I just get each other. We connect like we don't with anyone else. It's like we were familiar with each other before we even met. We're just comfortable. And, apparently, that's not enough. I don't know what else we need, but I guess we need something. That's an intro to the mom/wife of me. More about that later.

I'm also a teacher. I teach middle school and have for ten years now. Of those ten years, I've been pink slipped (laid off) 5. That's a lot of instability. I seriously lost half of my hair last summer waiting to hear my fate... and I have a lot of hair. I'm good at teaching. That's not wildly egotistical or anything. That's the feedback I receive. I enjoy it. But it is also reaching it's end. There's more to do, less to do it with and I just believe there are so many other things I will have fun doing. So that's another perspective I'll be coming from.

Finally, I love to talk. I believe (well, my sister told me one time) that I'm the white Oprah. I don't really believe that. But I do love to talk. I think if I had good conversation with interesting people (with really good food and wine) for the rest of my life, that's all I need (and to know that my children are happy). So the third perspective that I carry is that of a person seeking interesting people to talk to and anyone willing to listen.

Here it goes: pay attention if you think you'll connect with a teacher in trying times, trying to be a mom in a struggling marriage, and someone that just believes in good conversation and the desire to talk. I don't think anyone will read this. I don't even know how anyone sees it, but I already feel better for writing it down.

Thank you for sharing in this conversation. Here we go!

--- Teaching Mom Talks

3 comments:

  1. Here is one reader. I am deeply saddened and yet hopeful because of just about anyone I know you can make the best of every situation and will always triumph. My heart, my hugs, my ears, my conversation are always here for you!

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