So most nights as I'm tucking the kids in bed and saying goodnight, I try to remember to say to them, "Be brave, be true, be bold, be kind, be you." I don't know where I heard it, but I know I didn't make it up. I heard it somewhere, but it seemed like a good mantra to imbed in their subconscious. After seeing "The Help", I decided that saying, "You is kind. You is smart. You is important", was also super good. I like the idea of focusing on attributes that have nothing to do with the way we look. I so often tell my children how pretty or handsome they are and I realize I'm feeding into them thinking about the way they look as being super important. So, anyway, sometimes, in the morning, we say, "you are smart, you are kind, you are important." I can't think of anything wrong with it.
Ok, so back to my original train of thought. One night last week, kneeling on the floor next to my daughter's bed, having just turned off the light and being surrounded by nothing but the glow of her fish tank (really it's a snail tank because we can't keep the guppies alive), I say, "Be brave, be true, be bold, be kind, be you." And she says, "But mama, what if I"m not kind? What if I'm not the good things?" Hmm. Touche. Now what? I do the best I can and tell her that she has so many strengths and that she can always keep working on whatever she thinks she's not good at. And, really, it was a pathetic reply from me. I was surprised and didn't know what to say. Think about it, we're not all kind, we're not all bold, we're not all brave or true for that matter. Being "you" might not be that great. What do we do then? I'm still thinking about it. My favorite response to this situation came from my good friend. She said, "then Be Sorry!"
No comments:
Post a Comment